Your ex lover Boyfriend – Do You Know Why he or she Keeps Rejecting You?

Most breakups come as a shock and that is what is apt to throw you into an emotional tailspin. You may spend hours trying to figure out what you did in order to offend the man you love. Then you holiday resort to texting and calling him in an effort to get him to talk. All of your efforts end up by leaving you using a feeling of futility and you turn out to be convinced that you have lost him permanently.

However men don’ t react exactly like woman and what you think is the problem might not be close to what is bothering your ex boyfriend. This is why you need to understand how your ex thinks and start pulling him back instead of pushing him farther aside. First of all no matter how you beg him, your ex boyfriend is not going to simply tell you what is wrong. Men just don’ t do that.

In fact the reason he is constantly on the reject you could be that he is scared he might weaken and tell you the truth. However , there are ways that you can get within his mind and find the problem with no him having any clue in regards to what you are doing. This is nothing more than using man psychology to get your ex boyfriend to come out associated with his shell and talk to you and it is much easier than you think.

Right now he may be as disappointed and sorry about the breakup when you are, but men have a large ego and if he suddenly told you he had produced a mistake, it might make him seem weak in front of his buddies. Should your ex be like most men he has been telling his friends over a few ales about how he dumped you and you simply won’ t leave him by itself. No matter how much he wants you back, he can’ t permit himself to come begging you to forgive him.

Another reason for him rejecting you may be fear of commitment. Many men fear the obligation that comes with having a home and household. As long as you keep telling him you love him he has no fear of shedding you and so he will take his time getting back with you. The problem is which he might find someone else and never come back.

Things are usually apt to change abruptly if you provide him a reason to believe you have had enough and are moving on. Since it is well known that men will go after what they think they have lost, you need to make him believe that he may be losing you. All it will take is for you to begin ignoring him and start going out with your pals. This is not an attempt to make your ex sweetheart jealous. You have to show him that you can have a life without him.

Some men never realize what they have till they are in danger of losing it. As soon as your ex sees how important you are in order to his happiness, you won’ big t be able to keep him away from you.

8 Responses to “Your ex lover Boyfriend – Do You Know Why he or she Keeps Rejecting You?”

  • sam N:

    My ex boyfriend of almost 3 years has torn me up and ripped me to pieces. I’ve loved this guy more then words can explain and I still love him. When we started dating he used to be so sweet, he treated me like I was a princess. He cheated on me with multiple women ad I forgave him. He took his anger out on me and dumped me multiple times when i didn’t even do anything to him (he was mad at other people so he took his anger out on me and later apologized and I took him back), he kicked me out of his house when I had nowhere to go, called me names, threw things at me, he used to choke me and push me to the floor, mentally abuse me, call me a burden tell me that no one cares about me, that i’m nothing to him. He chose his friends that he met a little over 2 months ago over me. He won’t spend time with me, I have to beg him to come see me. He could go weeks and not speak to me, only notice my importance when i’m gone and the only thing he could muster is a “Hi”. I did everything for him, i bent over backwards for him. I would do anything for him, I was the BEST girlfriend to him, all his friends complimented and everyone that knew him, knew I was great. Even his parents wanted us to get married, they told him I was the best thing for him but he treated me so bad. Recently I got tired of the problems and the mistreatment and I told him in a letter about how I feel. When i went to his house to talk to him about it to see if we could resolve it, he slammed the door in my face, told me I was nothing, told me he never loved me, that he could get over me in a heartbeat and that I don’t mean anything to him, that i’m no good for him. I feel so hurt. After he treated me so bad he thinks he’s right?? That I’M not good for HIM? The anger is killing me. He even had the audacity to block me on Facebook. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I keep crying, I can’t concentrate in school. How can he be so heartless? In my letter I was so sweet, hoping we can work things out but he turns so vicious. I forgave him SO many times and when I asked why he wouldn’t talk to me when I always gave him chances his reply was “just because you gave me chances, that was your choice, I don’t have to give you any chances and I won’t.” Why?? How do I move past this. He’s probably out with some other girls and i’m over here crying and dying over him. I don’t know what to do, I just feel like my life is over.

  • Kevin:

    i am just SO insecure of myself that i think that all the boys in the world could never like me, and reject me, that im afraid to ask becuz of that. I really need a new bf though. I keep clinging on to my ex, and hes NO GOOD! i need help. wat should i do?
    but what if they dont come to me? ive been doing that. Ive been getting in shape and all that and dressing nice. But he just wont ask me out!! i no he likes me. I know he doe, but he just wont ask me ut. im tired of waitng 4 him. why would it look bad on my resume?

  • Rkmc:

    My EX and I dated for 3 years. We were first-lovers. We were so comfortable with one another, we were 100% ourselves; something very hard to be. We were so open with our feelings.

    Unfortunately, college life got the best of him, and he started making poor choices, getting in the wrong crowd, and neglecting me. I broke up with him. We didn’t talk for about 3 months (we were somewhat enemies). Then, he started begging for me back. He would talk to my parents, text me, call me nonstop…ETC. I was so hurt by him, that I forced myself to move on.

    So now, I have a new boyfriend (of 5ish months) and I’m completely unhappy. I’m getting ready to break it off with him because I’m just not happy. My ex finally got a new girlfriend, and he appears very happy, other than the fact that he is slightly trying to make jealous (by seeing that he has a new gf).

    I am madly in love with him and I believe we’re soulmates. He was my first love and I was his, and we made so many promises to one another. I just don’t know if I should confess this to him and if he rejects, move on – or keep it to myself.

    I miss him so much, what should I do? I thought about making a CD with a song that describes how I feel, and mail it to him.

  • Courtney:

    I’m in my mid-20s, and recently ended a pretty serious relationship of about a year. We had drifted apart. She ended things, however it was an amicable breakup, no bitterness or drama, and so we both agreed to stay friends.

    We gave each other a few weeks time apart, then I started to talk to her again to rebuild the friendship. However the talking seemed completely forced on her part – we’d chat, but she’d just give me short generic responses, didn’t show any real interest.

    I told her I missed her company, and that I wanted us to hang out again; she gave me the words that yes she wanted to, but never followed through. Her entire attitude said “I don’t really want you as a friend.”

    After a few weeks of that, I finally put an end to it. I sent her a goodbye message and explained that I wanted a real friendship and she wasn’t reciprocating, and that I’m not going to keep trying because I was constantly getting disappointed, feeling rejected, and basically driving myself nuts. Of course the letter was emotional, but it was reasoned and planned.

    She didn’t say anything directly to me in response, instead she makes a public status update that basically called me an asshole for “chewing her up,” which angered me a lot because I was genuinely trying to express how I felt. And before I even unfriended her on Facebook, she had deleted her entire account! She then proceeded to make a new profile and restart her online life from scratch and block me from it to ensure I can’t find her again. I only know this because of a mutual acquaintance.

    I’m just bewildered at why my decision to end contact would cause a response like this? Doesn’t make any sense. Was it just a final “fuck you” to undermine my decision to end the friendship? Does she really hate me that much? Why tell me she wants to be friends and act like this?

    I know the answer shouldn’t matter at this point, and yet I keep trying to analyze what happened there. What the hell happened?

  • Coffee t:

    Two months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of two years. I love him, but I don’t think we are right for each other. I started seeing a friend I’ve always had feelings for but we never had the right timing. I like this guy, but I’m having a lot of trouble completely getting over my ex. I miss him and I keep having weird dreams centered around him. I’m so conflicted about what to do. I really want a relationship with this new guy, but I still feel odd becoming comfortable with someone else. He just came out of a long term relationship too and is struggling but wants to be with me. I feel very lost. Help please?

  • ttocs:

    There’s this boy that I have just realised I am in love with, he’s my mums best friends son, I am 19 and he is 3 and a half years younger than me (say three years for arguments sake) and I am 19, I have known him my whole life. Our families are very close and he is like a cousin to me. I really have a thing for him and I’m pretty sure he has a thing for me too, well he used to. When we were kids he always used to playfight with me and I always got a vibe that he was doing it so he could touch and feel me. I remember before he always used to hug me and he used to hold on to me for long periods of time like he loved me or something. He always used to try and get me into his room alone to watch a film with him and he’d always ask me to lie on the bed with him, I always got a vibe that he was trying to set a spark. I remember we slept in the same bed before, as innocent kids, but he did try to get me to like sleep right beside him and hug him, I rejected his advances then because I felt it was wrong to be gay, but in the bed he would rub his feet with mine and I enjoyed that or I would wake up and he would be sleeping on top of me with his arms around me. I didn’t even understand it back then but I realise now! I just wish I had kissed him or taken advantages of his moves then cause now I feel I have lost him (as a lover) for good? I live in Ireland now and have done since I moved over with mum when I were kid, I/we still go over multiple times a year and I see him, England is like home away from home for me. It’s just now when I see him, he still playfights with me and I get that vibe, but I feel he’s not interested in me, I don’t even know if he’s deffo gay? I’m close with his mum too and feel if I got together with him I would ruin my relationship with her and her family and my own mum! I have just realised that I love him, wil be goin 2 live in uk 4 a few mnths soon wot do I do? I’m aware he has to come of age! I also remember when we were on holidays before, we were walking up from the beach and we kept spitting on eachother and hitting eachother with towels for a laugh and we were enjoying it, then for some strange reason his dad (who never really liked me) attacked me in a fit of rage. I also feel awkward being around his family now too, because they don’t know how I feel about him? On his fb it says he is interested in women but he has pictures of him like holding shirtless guys in a “certain way” and he looked like he was enjoying it, sometimes I notice it in him that he recognises guys and is attracted to them, but he lets on that he is straight but still doesn’t seem to be enthusiastic about girls? We were always so close. Im stressed I want him, please help! Why have I only realised that I love him now, how come I’ve never realised that I actually loved him, that’s what it was? And why now that I’ve realised, why does it hurt so much and make me feel sad and depressed?
    Sorry that I’m asking this question again, I just keep recalling memories that I want to put into the question! And I like to hear new responses as this is really getting me down!
    Yes I know it’s illegal, he has to come of age, but you don’t undertand I’ve known this guy my whole life, it’s only in the last 2 years that it’s been made akward, since I turned 18. He is only 3 years younger than me, if I were 26 and he were 23 nobody would think that was wrong! I love him, I just want to tell him that without hurting anyone, I just want him to know, and I am aware of what I can and cannot do, but I love him so much that I will wait for him, I just wish I actually had a chance with him, and I wish we could reconnect and spend more time together!
    Just to clarify I live in Ireland, but I will be going to live in England in a few months.

  • norrin_shadowwolf:

    My ex rarely texts me and I don’t text him. He dumped me exactly 2 weeks ago because he needed space to figure out what he wants and he was too busy with school and work to make time for me. So I’d been sulking for days and crying and posting sad fb statuses and begging for him back but I stopped a few days ago and tonight I went out with friends and posted about it on fb and he texted me this:

    “Hey I can see your starting to move on.. I think that’s good (: I’m happy for you and your life you have amazing potential you’ll be alright (:”

    And I replied saying thanks and that I had fun but I’m not trying to get a new guy and he didn’t reply.
    Why would he even text me? Couldn’t he just keep his happiness about getting rid of me to himself?

  • Sergeant Pickle:

    Im gonna try to keep this as short and simple as I possibly can. It so beyond complicated though. I dated this guy about two years ago when I was a freshmen, im now a junior. We fell in love, but because of things that happened he dumped me. He came out as being bi in the last month of our relationship as well. Things tore us apart, and I honestly believe that wed still be together if I would have been truthful to him about some stuff. Anyways, he wanted ot be friends after he broke up with me. I finally came around, because I wanted him in my life even if it was as a friend. He dated people, I dated someone. We talked all the time and were still good friends. He got jelaous of guys I dated still though. Then When I had just entered a relationship with a guy I really liked he text me saying I want you back, I made the biggest mistake letting you go and I love you so much. He said he was taking it slow with me and gradually gonna end up asking me out, he panicked when He knew I was with someone else because he realized he had waited to long. I wasnt just gonna wait around for him. But then I tore him down with rejection I told him to fuck off and leave me alone. We dropped contact pretty much after that. It was really wrong of me to be so rude to him, like I was really mean, I was jut pissed. I should have done it in a nicer way, but I didnt. I ended up talking to him a few months later cause I just had to see how he was, he text me back and sounded so happy to hear from me. His mom said that he had asked about me and if she had heard from me at all. She also told me that she thinks he really did love me, and that wed still be together if i hadnt broken the trust.Anyways We started talking again, and he started dating someone else. I broke up with my boyfriend that I was with, but not to get back with my ex, I just didnt want to be with the guy I was with anymore. Now were friends. I thought that we would only talk every once in awhle since it seems he is getting on with his life. But he talks to me a lot and is always wanting to see me when hes in town or if im in his town. Im friends with his new lover, who happens to be a guy. I love his boyfriend! Weird I know, but I really do think hes an awesome friend and guy. His boyfriend doesnt seem to mind that im around. My ex invites me to their house and he seems to like to see me whenever he can. I see him like every couple weeks. He always introduces me to people as his ex girlfriend/bestfriend. And even though were not together he still sais he loves me, and that he always will. That im the only girl hes ever been bi for and that he could never love another girl. Its like hes holding on partially but then not really. I love being his friend, but sometimes he acts like way more than just a bestfriend, just the things he does. THe gazing eye contact, him touching my boobs and butt, and still trying to wrestle me, or kissing me on my head. Why do you think he goes to such a great effort to keep me in his life?????? I dont think it is so he can get me back later, but maybe hes holding onto me just in case he decides to go for girls again haha? so confusing i know. Maybe he thinks im over him since I said that I didnt want him back, so he knows we can be just friends? Spare me the lectures of just get over him, ive heard it before. Im over him, but im curious as to why he wants his ex girlfriend who supposedly turned him gay in his life. Shouldnt he want nothing to do with me after rejecting him, and lying to him when we dated. (not saying he didnt do anything wrong either, but seriously)
    god its so long! and this is the short version. sorry people! ill answer all of yours if you give me detailed and thorough answers about your opinion of all of this stuff

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